1. Thou shall not impose your ambitions on thy child.
Remember that swimming is your child’s activity. Improvements and progress occur at different
rates for each individual. Don’t judge your
child’s progress based on the performance of other athletes and don’t push them
based on what you think they should be doing.
The nice thing about swimming is that every person can strive to do his
or her personal best and benefit from the process of competitive swimming.
2. Thou shall be
supportive no matter what.
There is only one question to ask a child after a practice
or competition-“Did you have fun?” If
meets and practices are not fun, your child should not be forced to
participate.
3. Thou shall not
coach thy child.
You are involved in one of the few youth sports programs
that offer professional coaching. Do not
undermine the professional coach by trying to coach your child on the
side. Your job is to provide love and
support and a safe place to return to at the end of the day. Love and hug your child no matter what. The coach is responsible for the technical
part of the job. You should not offer
advice on technique or race strategy or any other area that is not yours. And above all, never pay your child for a
performance. This will only serve to
confuse your child concerning the reasons to strive for excellence and weaken
the swimmer/coach bond.
4. Thou shall only
have positive things to say at a swimming meet.
If you are going to show up at a swimming meet, you should
be encouraging and never criticize your child or the coach. Both of them know when mistakes have been
made. Please remember that “yelling
at” is not the same as “cheering for”.
5. Thou shall
acknowledge the child’s fears.
Your child’s first swimming meet, 500 free or 200IM can be a
stressful situation. It is totally
appropriate for your child to be scared.
Don’t yell or belittle, just assure your child that the coach would have
not suggested the event if your child was not ready to compete in it. Remember your job is to love and support your
child through their entire swimming experience.
6. Thou shall not criticize the official.
If you do not care to devote the
time or do not have the desire to volunteer as an official, please don’t
criticize those who are doing the best they can.
7. Honor thy child’s
coach.
The bond between coach and swimmer is a special one, and one
that contributes to your child’s success as well as fun. Do not criticize the coach in the presence of
your child, as it will only serve to hurt your child’s swimming.
8. Thou shall be
loyal and supportive of thy team.
It is not wise for parents to take their swimmers and jump
from team to team. The water isn’t
necessarily bluer in another team’s pool.
Every team has its own internal problems-even teams that build
champions. Children who switch from team
to team are often ostracized for a long time by the teammates they leave behind
and are slowly received by new teammates.
Often swimmers find that switching teams does not improve their
performance.
9. Thy child shall
have goals besides winning.
Most successful swimmers are those who have learned to focus
on the process not the outcome. Giving
an honest effort regardless of the outcome is much more important than
winning. One Olympian said, ”My goal was to set a world record. Well, I did that, but someone else did it
too, just a little faster than I did. I
achieved my goal, but I lost. Does this
make me a failure? No, in fact I am very proud of that swim.” What a tremendous outlook to carry through
life!
10. Thou shall not
expect thy child to become an Olympian.
There are 250,000 athletes in USA Swimming and we keep a
record of the top 100 all time swimming performances by age group. Only 2 of the swimmers listed in the 10 and
under age group made it to the top 100 in the 17-18 age group. There are only 52 spots available for the
Olympic team every four years. Your
child’s odds of becoming an Olympian are about .0002%
Swimming is much more than just the Olympics. Ask your coaches why they coach. Chances are, they were not Olympians, but
still got so much out of swimming that they wanted to pass the love for the
sport on to others. Swimming teaches
self-discipline and sportsmanship; it builds self-esteem and fitness; it
provides lifelong friendships and much more.
Most Olympians will tell you that these intangibles far outweigh any
medal they may have won. Swimming builds
good people, like you want your child to be, and you should be happy your child
wants to participate.